It’s internatonal world happiness day! So instead of thinking about making the world happy I thought we can focus on making ourselves happy. If you take the time to make your own life a happy place to be in then imagine the whole world doing the same. The world in that moment would be smiling, giving, receiving and not fighting. Impossible but not impossible to fix our very own world……YOU.
Free your heart from hatred
It’s a really strong word, hate. Hate this, hate that hate how this made me feel. Hate.
Say it. Did it make you feel calm? I hate the word hate. It gives me negative vibes, makes me feel anxious, is something or someone going to zap my energy for the rest of my life or am I going to let it go?
I have had so many terrible life changing, no going back experiences where I felt it, that word and it broke me, alongside the event being difficult enough to deal with I was festering this feeling creating more distress than neccessary. I totally accept there are many events in life that cannot be erased nor can the feelings you bore at the time be forgotten but with your inner strength and self motivation to seek happiness going forward then the hate will dissipate and be replaced with something else. Something more. Memories.
The new memory focus can be remembering when you were happy. What made you happy in this story before it all went incredibly wrong? Take those memories or take your pride in yourself at how you dealt with that situation and turn it into a lesson. Find someone who makes you laugh and hang out with them.
Dislike something, don’t forgive if it’s not what you want or can do but drop the hate…..if you can. If not, or not yet…. let’s look at the further 4 rules of happiness.
Free your mind from worries
Oh my goodness! There’s so much to worry about.
Paying the bills, the rent, the mortgage, the car, the loan for the last holiday, the credit card for the next holiday, the vet bills, the health insurance, the life insurance, the funeral plan! The pets food, the kids food, your neighbours food who lost their home, lost their jobs, are on the seat of the arse and you feel guilt! Guilt? Guilt for having the house, the car, the credit rating, the food in the fridge, the pets, the kids clothed and the job to pay for all of it……. eventually.
So, you’re reasonably intelligent, you have an ability to earn money, to ration, to make better choices about how you spend money, live within your means and reduce outgoings. If you lessen the worries by choice and by making sound decisions, reduce the amount of blame going from you towards another who you blame for your worries…… you WILL free yourself from worries.
Take a look at this link for
People often say how calm I am In situations or that I’m always smiling but it wasn’t always the case that I knew how to direct my day to day anguish. I bought Jacks original 4 part cd in 2006 and it was the best thing I did. I listened to cd 1 again yesterday….. I’ve been in turmoil for a few months and needed a reminder. I just kept saying yes, yes, yes, no its not what you’re thinking!
Laying in the sunshine listening with my eyes closed is preferred for me to reading a really long book, although I do that too.
Woah! I can hear you now!
“This woman’s going to tell me to ditch my luxuries “
No. It’s about removing the trash. The trash you hoard. Physically and emotionally.
I’m a self confessed hoarder, “it will come in useful one day” I repeat it again when my husband tells me, get rid of this trash.
I got that 20 years ago from a special market, or from a special person, or I bought it to compliment something I had at the time, or in a home it suited 20 years ago…..
The scenarios are endless, the birthday dress for my 21st, the last piece of the very first dinner set I bought as an adult. The question is always the same….. when did you last use it? Look at it? Enjoy it?
GET RID OF IT!
It’s now taking up space a new piece of trash can replace.
Try it, go into your drawers and be ruthless, I bet more than 50 per cent of it survives the drawer for another year at least but you made a start. Put it in a box, bag it up and find your local charity store, let someone else treasure your gems, your books, your clothing. I’m getting good now, 22 years after leaving home, I’m annoyed with myself that i have so much junk and after moving countries, after down sizing from a whole house to a car full, I’m in denial that stuff I got ten years before that move even made it to the car never mind the space in the at least 10 subsequent house moves in 15 years!
I’m settled now so I now desire tidy, I need order and arrangement and less stuff just lying around taking up space. I take all my treasure to my local Charity shop a second hand shop raising money constantly to help the animals in need forever crossing their path.
Live simply part 2… stop beating your head with effort for that friend who a does nothing for you, has no time unless it’s for them, lets you down when you made plans over and over again. It’s time consuming trash that affects the way we feel. The negative feeling of being let down. Live simply, live for you and you’ll have enough of your happiness to give to people who deserve it.
Live simply part 3. Sometimes, often times, people care too much of what others think about the car you own, the holidays you have, the number of times you go to dinner and where. STOP! Be happy, have the car you can afford, holiday in a place and manner that pleases you and/ or doesn’t break the bank, eat in or out, who cares?
If someone judged me on whether I wore Jimmy choos or a pair of flats from Dunnes, well I’d be in a very bad place. Maybe they do but I don’t see because I’m not expecting to. That’s freedom.
Live simply being you!
Be honest. This isn’t about the junk, it’s about you, me, us.
Time is a precious commodity you can give. It requires us to leave our lives for an hour, a call, an email, a message of support…..many things require time, many things we can do for others can cost nothing more than our time. It can be a diversion from what we were on a journey to do, a call we have no real time to take but the person or animal you choose to give your time for will never forget you did that! And who knows where we’ll need that time from someone willing to give theirs to us?
P.s. whilst I think about the above, I still need people to give that oooooooohhhh Karoline, here’s a money tree so you can live freely and worry about nothing and just take care of your rescued animals….. I’ve tried to grow one but I don’t seem to have the right seed!
I give my time, never twice to someone who didn’t respect it the first time around that’s a lesson we learn but we should move on and give again. Somewhere along the line karma kicks in trust me. Those that kicked others In the teeth get found out and the others help you right back when you most need it.
Give from your heart and you’ll be paid back ten fold down the line.
Here’s one of my personal examples Pay it Forward
So you expect your friend to collect you everytime you go somewhere? Wrong. Your friend needs to be wanted not needed.
Expecting your parents to pick up the bill for your choices long after you declared independence?
Expecting the local mechanic to fix your car at a discount because you are a nice person? Are you nice enough to pay his rent?
Never ask for something you wouldn’t be prepared to give and you won’t go far wrong.
You expect you should get that job.
Why? What effort did you put into the application? What research did you do? The other applicants had sleepless nights worrying had they put enough effort in, if they’d made the right impression……
If you believe in yourself enough, your expectations of your own application to life will pick you up when you reached 2nd place in a job with a thousand applicants.
Expect less…read this article, did you grow up with realistic values? I’d value your feedback but I won’t expect it.
ONE LAST THING…. yes there is a rule 6…..
Expect more from yourself
Expect that if you put the effort in you’ll receive the desired results. Make an extra effort with your client, you’ll get more from your client. Go the extra mile for a friend in need, you’ll strengthen your self pride. Stretch your imagination when dressing, reap the rewards of compliments. Study and get a top grade or meander through and get an average grade… use every opportunity that knocks to raise your profile, to enrich your life, expect more for tomorrow than you did when you woke up this morning.